The nice person is always the Loser

I'm sick of being the nice person. I never get my way. It always seems like the manipulative, vindictive, and deceptive person always gets what they want. I don't even know how to be a bitch. I can be passive-aggressive but never the manipulative bitch that always has her way.

I'm beginning to think that my ex is really not as nice as I thought he was. I asked a rhetorical question, "Why does he have to be the winner, the victor?" (no pun intended.) He didn't want me, and that's what he has, No Lizzy. No Stupid-fat-cry-baby-clingy Lizzy. My friend told me that I just feel that way because I want him and that in reality, he's the loser because he doesn't have the sweet and wonderful me.

Hmph! Yeah right. If I'm so wonderful, how come I'm here alone on a Friday night?

Oi, this is so freaking pathetic.

In reality, I really haven't been dwelling on him so much lately. I'm beginning to forget all the wonderful times we had together. But then I see a romantic movie or hear a song and I thought, "Why can't I be the desired one; the one that someone is going to fight for to be with me; the One?"


I thought I was going to enjoy living by myself, but I hate it. It makes me realize how alone I am.